WHY I PLAY.
AN INTROSPECTIVE LOOK AT THE MOTIVATION OF THE OLDER RMFL PLAYERS AS WELL AS AN OVERALL LOOK AT WHAT MOTIVATES RMFL PLAYERS TO COME OUT YEAR AFTER YEAR…
A Feature Story by: Jared Neumeier
Posted: February 21, 2008
RMFL – Former Rhino-Raider all-star wide receiver, Damon Greenberry, posed the question a few days ago on the message board that created quite a stir of ideas and thoughts.
Why CONTINUE to play football… when is ‘enough… enough’?
Although only in his late 20’s, Greenberry is far from an “older” player, however, he has certainly accomplished just about any individual as well as team goals that could ever be set for any one player. He has won receiving titles, set records, won MVP’s and… championships. Here is an excellent example of a “younger” player with nothing left to prove to anyone.
So, that begs the question. When you have nothing left to prove to anyone… even yourself… why continue to play.
This will be the discussion I will take up in this article.
Although the question REALLY applies to the older player, which I will define as 35 and older, the same questions can be asked by younger players who have had a great earlier career, either in college, younger RMFL days… or both.
I opened up submissions from around the league to have players e-mail me with their input on this question. The submittals ranged in age and motivation. In fact, I found myself looking more for a common thread of reasons, since there were some very unique situations reported. Ultimately, I felt, the guys may even have missed some of the most obvious and pervasive reasons that we all play.
The number one reason that many think might be why guys play… or keep playing, i.e. “the love of the game”, I will even argue isn’t even in the top 3 reasons why guys play.
I will suggest, however, that the motivations of playing are re-ordered for older and younger players. Older players are more inclined to play for such reasons as “to prove they still can” or “for their kids” or even “to stay in shape”. Younger players are more inclined to play as an “outlet” or for “something to do” or even more for “the camaraderie” and friendships.
However, even all of these reasons miss what I think is the real primary reason we play:
We play… because we CAN.
I don’t even suggest that in the most obvious and literal sense. When I say “we can”, I’m not saying we “can” because there is this league called the RMFL and our team to play on, I’m saying we “can” because almost every player in the RMFL plays… or continues to play… because football is something we are good at.
Think about it. Almost every player you meet on your football team, although he may not be the best linebacker, running back , offensive lineman or quarterback in the league, is probably a lot better than almost every Tom, Dick and Harry they will see around town or wherever they work.
Guys that try to play for teams that aren’t very good, ultimately don’t play… and then quit. If you have never golfed before and head to the course to try your hand, you are going to be terrible and probably not want to play anymore. The same can be said for just about any sport or activity that we aren’t very good at… things we just haven’t done much of.
Football, on the other hand, for most of us… for those who submitted and for those who didn’t, is a sport that we loved and played as kids… at some point we played it a lot… and got reasonably good at. Now, as adults, most of us on our own, it’s an outlet for many positive things.
The primary driving reason we play then…
Playing football makes us feel good about ourselves.
Whether its because we are a star player and we love that positive reinforcement, or we are an average player (still a lot better than Joe Blow at the office) or we are a “role” player who just enjoys wearing the jersey… THAT is really why we play.
To be sure, there are many players that really don’t “Love” the game of football. I know this for a fact, because for much of my career, I have even been one of them. As much as football has meant to me in a lot of ways, I can honestly say I still don’t “Love” the game. I’ve never been a big fan of the rah, rah emotional element, I’ve never been a big fan of how some guys think that intimidation needs to be part of the game, and I don’t like any sport where it is routinely taught by coaches that you “do whatever you can get away with” as it taught by far too many football coaches.
What do I like about the game?
That’s easy too. Football is one of the purest physical challenges in all sports. It is the closest thing to a controlled “war” that we have. You are constantly struggling to “gain ground”. Push the opposition forces back. Hold defense against their forces. I love the strategy of the game. I love the precision of a well-oiled passing attack. I love the “chess match” between coaching staffs. Ultimately, I love the teamwork. As Kody Merritt, of the Bear River Valley Rockets said, “Football requires everybody on the team to do his job or the team won’t be successful. If someone takes a break, the play won’t work.”
So when does football STOP making us feel good about ourselves? Are there other reasons to stop playing?
The answer to the second question is YES… We will still stop playing even though we still enjoy the game and continue to reap good feelings from it. We play football because it makes us feel good about ourselves… but its far from the only reason.
FOOTBALL FOR THE OLDER PLAYER
In the RMFL, football is enjoyed by guys ranging in age from 18 to 59 (haven’t heard of any 60-year olds yet, but stay tuned). Assuming they are all playing for the primary reason already stated, then the next question is what is it that makes them feel good about playing football? Certainly those reasons are different, particularly from age group to age group.
Older players, (and this could mean guys like Greenberry, who aren’t 35, however, still have the same sorts of issues), have to contend with professional responsibilities, wives, kids, mortgage payments and… a body that doesn’t snap back into position nearly as quickly and easily as it used to. Further, many older players, although certainly not all, have already had a “career”. A younger player who only played high school ball or who played in college… but didn’t sniff the playing field often enough will be extra motivated by “something to prove”. They want to show what they could have done if given a chance in their post high school career. They may, in fact, still hold on to the possibility of being “discovered” by a lower level professional team and still have a chance at a “career” in football… somehow.
A player that is over 35 will have no such illusions. Although plenty of over 35’s may not have a wife or even a girlfriend… many to most will have children.
Several respondents, including Greenberry and Utah Wolverine star, Roger Shulze, talked about their children. Shulze as a reason to play, to show them what “dad can do” and set a positive example. Greenberry even goes on to say, he wants his son to know “that even though I didn’t make the NFL… daddy was somebody.”
In my own experience, I can completely understand both sides… and they both are VERY significant. Like Greenberry, when I was a full time starting quarterback for the first 4 years of the Idaho Falls Mustangs, my two kids were far too young to really understand or care about what dad was doing playing football. I would have loved for them to see, understand, and care, but younger kids will not. What younger kids need… is their dad’s time.
In 2002, when I spent a year with the Madison Lionz as a back up quarterback, I remember many of the games my kids came to. My daughter was 7 and my son was 6… still too young. I would be standing on the sideline… watching other guys play most of the time and would look back at my kids in the stands… and feel awful. Football was not making me feel good about myself. I just could not escape the feeling inside that I would be having a lot more fun playing with them… than doing this.
Oh, my kids were great. Every time they caught my attention, they would wave emphatically at me like I was the “Star of the team”. They would bide their time by swinging around on the rails and playing games between themselves until they caught dad’s attention. They did this for the better part of 3 hours.
As a father, I felt like a failure. In fact, even when playing and starring, I felt like a failure as a father for my time playing football. Between practices and games, especially long away games, it took time away from my family… and my kids. It left me always asking myself, “is it all worth it?” I can’t say that I was ever sure the answer was yes.
The number one concern for the older player, even beyond the ultimate decline of their physical skills and/or ability to heal after a tough game are just other demands of their time… particularly wife and kids.
Two long-time RMFL stars, Sean Powell of the Mustangs, who has been involved with the team since 1997 and Dave Stireman of the Rhino-Raiders who joined and lead the team since 1999 have both either pulled away from the game, or are looking to for these very same reasons. Powell is only 30 and Stireman is 44. Both have kids that are involved in just about every sport under the sun and they are either coaching them or attending all their games or both. They, like many parents with athletic kids, are transitioning from their own athletic pursuits, to that of their children.
If older players don’t have the concern of younger children who need their time OR if they have resolved those issues, then the primary anti-motivations become physical.
There is no question that football is a very physical game. Its one of the reasons we love the game. However, there is also no question that the physicality of the game takes its toll. There are few players that I have ever known of that have played the game for any amount of time that do not have some sort of permanent injury or “disfigurement”. For myself, I only have two bone “bumps” and a couple of mis-formed fingers to show for my time. I consider myself lucky. After last season, when talking to Dave Stireman about his impending retirement, he talked about the many years that he played at a high level and the fact that he is able to “walk away” from the game is important. Knees were not built for the abuse of football and if anyone can play, enjoy, then leave the game without permanent knee damage is… very lucky.
I know when I assess older quarterbacks that what I know I will get is more consistent play than from a younger quarterback. I also know, however, that I may have a player that will be a lot less inclined to “hang in the pocket” or run when the need arises. An older quarterback, in fact, any older player, just gets less and less inclined to put their body through more and more abuse. We grow comfortable as we get older. We have nicer cars, houses, eat good food (less mac and cheese) and we have less patience for the healing process between games. Eventually, our bodies tell us its time to hand ‘em up.
Therefore, what makes an older player hang on are several things. First, they need to be still feeling good about playing. This means that they cannot be confronting guilt issues regarding those they love. They need to have their support and/or excitement or pride. Second, their bodies need to still be recovering within an acceptable time frame. Finally, for most, they need to be playing. There are some older players that just feel “lucky to be on a team”, but I know for myself… and most of us who have played this game as one of the best since they were 6 years old, there is no such thing as a comfortable bench.
FOOTBALL FOR YOUNGER PLAYERS
There are probably two main reasons that keep younger players from playing. First and foremost is probably money. Second is their job.
Younger players are, obviously, a lot less likely to have family concerns (although its certainly not out of the question), however, younger players with children don’t have the psychological issues of an older player with kids. If you are 21 and have a small child, no one would think twice about you wanting to play football and be dad. You are 21 and should still try to enjoy your youth. When you are 35 and have a small child, it almost seems frivolous to be playing something as demanding as football when you have small children.
Younger players are also far less affected by the pounding. Sure, they hurt the next day, but they are far less likely to hurt ALL WEEK, like the older players… right Phil Sotomayor… Todd Wheelwright (40+ aged offensive linemen)?
This section of the article needs far less print, since most of the readership is in this group and they know exactly why they play. You play because you are a good player, you love the contact, you love the camaraderie and you may still have “something to prove”. You may also have a legit shot of advancing your career past the RMFL. The RMFL provides you the perfect outlet to “continue playing” when you didn’t think you would get to. Probably a common thread of the younger submittals is that they enjoyed playing in high school and/or college. Missed the game for a few years; didn’t think they would ever get to play again; then discovered the RMFL.
What we have all found, particularly those of us who have managed a team, is that younger players are all sorts of excited to play football… until it comes time to pay for equipment, player fees and attend practices regularly. Many younger players have proven less dedicated and certainly less capable of planning far enough ahead to support playing on a team that doesn’t come with the prestige that came with playing on your high school team. Further, in high school, practice was right after school and all your friends were going… and if you missed, there would be repercussions.
For many teams in the RMFL, they find themselves “cutting a lot of slack” to their young talent… as a matter of survival and maintaining competitiveness.
I always contend that you don’t really have a player on your team, particularly one of these younger guys, until they have shelled out for equipment and paid whatever fees are required. Often times, they never want to admit they are either strapped or just don’t want to commit the dough… they just stop returning calls and disappear.
Younger players are also more likely to have weekend employment, further cutting into their availability to play.
SO… SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I GO NOW…
So… what have we solved… if anything? Should Damon Greenberry and anyone battling many of the same issues continue to play… or walk away with nothing left to prove?
First of all, I’ve never talked to a younger football player who I wouldn’t encourage to figure out a way to come up with the money for equipment… and play. You are not going to be young forever… equipment is a one time cost and it is just too worth it over the years.
The question is only significant for our “older players”. When is it time to quit?
First of all, it is important to note that if you do “walk away”… you don’t have to “stay away”.
A player who decides to “retire” can always “un-retire”, right?
However, if you play and you are not feeling good about playing, or you get seriously injured… you cannot get your time back… you may not be able to get your health back. There are some injuries you cannot “un do”.
My advice to any player that has played a long time, you have nothing left to prove and you are feeling the call of other responsibilities or interests is to take a “trial retirement”. Walk away… don’t sell your equipment.
The game isn’t going anywhere.
If retirement is right, you will know it. Of course, you will still ‘feel the itch’, but the good feeling you may have in your joints, muscles and psyche might just be enough to know that the new phase of being a coach, spectator or a the world’s greatest fly fisherman… is right for you.
Walk away when you are ready… just be sure to WALK away… No matter what, the rest of your life is a lot longer than your time in football, no matter how much fun you had doing it.
TESTIMONIALS:
WHY I PLAY
DAMON
GREENBERRY, AGE (NOT STATED), POSITION: WIDE RECEIVER
“It’s more therapy for me. My mom was murdered in the
streets of
PHIL
SOTOMAYOR (RHINO-RAIDERS), AGE 43, POSITION: OFFENSIVE LINE
“Guys
like us who play every down and get hit every play and feel the pain in our
knees, shoulders, hands, head etc...
Its hard to explain why I kept playing. I love to play
the game, even though I've never scored a touchdown or caught a ball or ran
with the ball.
I get to push and get pushed around for the entire game. I enjoy doing that, I
enjoy the talking that goes on during the game with my teammates as well the
other team.
There is nothing in the real world that compares to playing in a game with your
buds.
I was fortunate to play college football, and after finishing, I was left with
a void in me. Don't get me wrong I wasn't all depressed hanging on to my
playing days, I just felt like I lost a good friend and it was sad to think I'd
never get to see it again. Playing basketball or golf didn't come close to
replacing it.
Even at 43 years old and after retiring from this league not once but twice,
this time of year is hard for me I'm always torn about whether I have one more
season in me. This year is no different.
Like you said Damon, I have nothing to prove, its
never been that for me, I love to win but I love to play more.
That’s what keeps me going, its certainly not the roar of the crowd that kept
me coming back, cause we didn't have enough fans to make a roar, rather its my
quarterback, running back, receiver or fellow lineman coming back to the huddle
and saying, "hey big fella, nice block"
In my mind, if your doing it for anything else, don't bother cause it will fade
quickly. It has to come from inside you and no external influence will keep it
going.”
DAVE
GARZA (
“The will to play, from an athlete, is never in question. In
our hearts we will always have the will to play, regardless of age and physical
ability.
I too started playing at a very young age, and last year at 41 I had the will
but questioned the physical ability and potential for injury. I chose to play
and just worked harder to prepare my body more than I ever had before.
I feel that when it comes to athletes wanting to endeavor further in their
sport it comes down to a question of priorities. Which in this game, change day
to day. Those who have families make bigger sacrifices
than those who do not. Never the less life comes into play, work,
relationships, kids, you name it.
What we all have to consider eventually is that some day we all have to walk
away, even when we choose not to. What you have to consider is whether you can
walk away while at peace. Peace with yourself, your teammates, the team, your
accomplishments, etc.
But remember something, you can walk away from playing, but that doesn't mean
you have to walk away from teaching, and this is where you will have your
greatest impact as well as accomplishments.”
TODD
WHEELWRIGHT (RHINO-RAIDERS), AGE 42, POSITION: OFFENSIVE LINE
“It’s not about the glory. It’s all about the warrior spirit
that lives in all good athletes. I’m 42 and I still love to compete just as
much as I did when I was 18, I don’ get as mad when I lose as I use to and I
don’t have to hate the person across the line from me anymore, but the rest of
it is the same. I like what Dave use to say to me. He said,
I still play because I can.”
MIKE
KIERPEC (SPEED), AGE 34, POSITION: OFFENSIVE LINE
“I have always loved the game and all that was involved in it. I
went to the marines instead of college, so I didn’t play after high school. I
never thought I would play organized football again. Then seven years ago I was
diagnosed with cancer. Two surgeries and 4 cycles of chemo and numerous stays
in the hospital my cancer was in recession. When I was sick I thought of the
things that made me happy and things I enjoyed in life and playing football was
one of them. so I decided that when it was over and if
I was able to I would play football again. so when I
got healthy I started playing in a 8 man league in
KODY
MERRITT (ROCKETS), AGE 33, POSITION: TIGHT END
“I have been playing
football for a lot of years. I took a brake after collage because, quite
frankly, I had never heard of semi-pro football. I guess what I am trying
to say is I would have been, and will be playing this sport as long as I
still can. I can honestly say, that the man I am
today has a lot to do with what football has taught me. I know of no
other team sport, where the team as a whole is so important. Football
requires everybody on the team to do his job or the team wont be successful. If someone takes a brake, the play
won’t work.”
ROGER
SHULZE (WOLVERINES), AGE (NOT STATED), POSITION: LINEBACKER
“The
reason why I play is to compete, to know that I can still run with the
youngsters and beat their a**. I play because it makes me feel good, along
with allowing my kids the opportunity to see their dad work his tail off to do
something he loves to do, not for money, but for the game, camaraderie and to
knock heads.”
JARED
HARWARD (RHINO-RAIDERS), AGE 30, POSITION: DEFENSIVE BACK
“I had
played college ball for 4 years as a starter the whole time. I had my awards
and time. When I was at snow college we played what
was called the
KYLE
BURGESS (KNIGHTS), AGE 29, POSITION: PLACE-KICKER
“I play because in 10 years I don’t want
to be sitting on my couch watching guys on tv play
this great game and be saying to myself, “I should of played when I had a
chance.” Live life to its fullest and enjoy what you can while you can.”
BRYCE KENNINGTON
(SHOCK), AGE 26, POSITION: PLACE-KICKER
“The reason I play football is the competitive balance, passion
and role model aspect. The ability to do something most kids dream
about. When you suit up and walk out on that field, kids in the stands look
at you as if you were an NFL player. Its sets the bar
for those kids to achieve their dreams. The competition is at an
all time high in the RMFL, and being able to do something you are so passionate
about if not in college or the NFL, then at the Semi-Pro level.
Its a place where you can showcase your talent, yet
still rely on friends and team mates to complete the victory. Winning
isn't everything, but it sure looks and feels good when your winning more
then losing. Helps to build character in most people.
That is why, in my
mind, Football is the greatest team sport. I love it, and the type of
people it attracts, and as long as my overweight body allows to
play, I will continue to play!”
JUSTIN
HOWARD (WOLVERINES), AGE 23, POSITION: UNKNOWN
“I look to play knowing that if I dont, I’ll look back on the decision the rest of my life and wish that I had. After sitting out two years since playing University ball at Weber State, I had nearly gone insane knowing that I still had the physical ability and definitely the desire to continue to play the sport I have built my entire life around. I have football to thank for everything I have going for me. Since I was 8 football has taught and honed so many of my skills that I use every day. The discipline, the drive to be better at everything that I do, but more importantly, the need to feel accomplishments and pride for everything that I have. I play because football fills a hole that would otherwise eat away and consume me over time. If I am not playing the sport I am watching it, or dreaming it. When the time comes that I am to pack up the equipment and walk away, I want to be sure that I have no regrets about the decision. Football is one of the greatest gifts to man.
And the RMFL is an outlet for us to use that
gift.”
JON JENSON
(WOLVERINES), AGE 21, POSITION: RUNNING BACK
“The
older I get the more it seems my life is scheduled and more monotonous.
Football is something that not only gives me a break from boring work days, but
it has also taught me valuable lessons that I don't think I could've learned
anywhere else. I saw that Damon was feeling like his championships were kind of
pointless, but if he didn't play ball, he wouldn't have them. So I guess what
I'm saying is that isn't it better to have achieved something, even if it's not
nationally recognized. Any one that has played in the RMFL comes out
every year trying to do what the Rhino-Raiders have been doing for the last 7
or so years. You can talk to anyone inside the league and while they might
not like the Rhino's, they have respect for them. I think what they have
accomplished is something that might not ever be surpassed, and am looking
forward to maybe getting to play and learn something from a few of them that
have come over to play with the Wolves. I play for the love of the game.
There is nothing else that can give you that same rush.”